Wednesday, January 04, 2006
i think it does alot of explaining for some differnt things
So, i think i owe you some explaining. Ive been doing alot of
thinking lately and you happen to be part of it=) I know u prolly think
im an idiot for going out with ashley. well sometime i think your right
and then she has these moments were i cant believe i got so lucky. im
torn in two.... scratch that... in three...... on one side i have you,
were i enjoy being able to talk with you for hours on end, your
beautiful, funny, i love hanging out with you, and you wake up a part of
me that no one else can. but in the back of mind its a fairytail. too
good to be true almost. great family, great girl, everthing i look for,
everthing im told to look for. on another side i got ashley. She is more
down to earth but she is real to me. She represents more of what im
facing in life. Maybe not quite everything i dreamed of but special to
me more than anything else. Ive been able to forge (i do mean forge
through hard work and ALOT of patience) a relationship with her like i
have never had with anyone else. She is my strenght and my weakness. i
hate it and love it all at the same time. A bittersweet symphony.....
and finally, right in front of me, i have a two year mission to serve.
You well know that i havent exactly always been the Peter Priesthood
that i should have been. The bishop pulled me into his office the other
day and we had a long talk about my next 9 months. (do you believe it, i
only got 9 months, i start gathering paperwork and getting everything
ready in 3-4 months) Deep down inside i know that i need to put all of
this aside and get ready for what lies ahead..... i know that im not
going to put off a mission to stay home for a girl=) but i dont do so
well with the temptation that comes with being with a girl. I guess
thats why i wrote all of this is to explain to you what in the world is
going through my head. I doubt you really even care because you got
Aaron(i think thats his name?) and i got Ashley. I feel like im prolly
overwhelming to you but i cant help it.....=) i remember the night i
told i love you.....jeez, feels like so long ago...... i should just
quit life and go be best friends with Eli and his "i come up with all of
this insipring stuff and have no idea what i really mean by it" self=)
ok, well, at any rate, i feel better now that i got that out. Im probably going to feel like an idiot after i send this but hey, whats life for? we only get one chance, mine as well not waste time.
thanks for listening=)
dale
p.s. it would probably not be a bad idea if you didnt show this to
anyone because it would only create drama..... 4 everyone...........
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| Posted 1/4/2006 10:33 AM - 1 View - 0 eProps - 0 comments - edit it |
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